::.. To trust or not to trust ..::
Here's the URL in case you're interested... ORKUT
Anyway, what else new in my life? Errr... not much to be honest. And my love life's a mess. Would you believe me if I told you that the last time I went on a date was in February? No wait, that was in January. How pathetic is that, huh?
He was a nice chap I guess. Met him a few times during Sack Trick gigs, and we kind of got along. The problem was, I just liked him. And to be with someone, I really need to have a big crush on that person, or else I get fed up and it won't work out. It didn't...
He just was interested in having sex... I refused.
The problem with me is that I need a good challenge. I need to fight for what (or should I say who?!?) I want. Which means that I usually end up having a huge crush on guys that either have a girlfriend (not very convenient, huh?) or are commitment phobic.
Stupid, stupid, stupid ME !!!
I always tell myself... "Katie, stop being so picky. And instead of searching for the perfect match, try to find yourself a nice chap" ... it always fails !!!
The problem is that even though I like challenges, I never seem to be able to make the first step. I'm kind of shy with guys, you see, specially when I really fancy their pants. Unless I am drunk. But again, I end up regretting what I did, 'cuz I usually forget half of what happens. Like with that guy last year. I really fancied him. We'd been kind of flirting for a while and when I was in London he eventually came home. I was so wasted that I couldn't even remember going back to my place.
Some weeks later, I was speaking with that guy I can't even stand (I'll call him A here... just to keep him anonymous!!!), and he told me that B (that's yet another guy) had told him about what had happened with guy number 1 (am I being clear here?!?). The thing was that (as I later found out) guy number 1 told his best friend B all the details, who told... God knows who (well, so far I found out that he told guy A and that guy I dated back in January...). I really was mad when I found out. That was private. What a childish behaviour for a grown up man. Now, I don't even know if I should blame guy number 1 for telling his best friend, or guy B for gossiping about stuff that didn't even concern him.......
All that bloody story really hurt me !!! I'd never have believed he would do such a stupid thing. But believe me, I've learnt from my mistake....... DON'T TRUST GUYS !!!
So, I'm not likely to meet someone as I first need to trust a man before I can get any further.
Argh... what the hell's wrong with me ?!?!